Women are so valuable!

Today my blog is a sad one and has nothing to do with fashion, style or the way you dress. Today I am focusing on the girls that have been kidnapped in Africa. As long as we keep these girls in our hearts and fresh in the minds of everyone, their plight will not go away. We MUST continue dialogue about these girls. We must convince people to stand up and FORCE our government to do something.

My business which is located at 1729 W Tighlman street in Allentown PA supports women. We purchase jewelry, bags, anything that is made by women all over the world, including our United States. These purchases that we make support many things. An AIDS orphanage in Africa, Autism, Sexual Slavery ('buy the bag, not the body') the 'undie fund' in Peru,...many many different causes. We try to build confidence in women and encourage women to raise up other women. I would be amiss as a supporter of women if I did not continue to speak out against sexual slavery. No woman should be forced to do ANYTHING that she did not choose to do.

Sexual exploitation is all over the world. Not just Africa, not just a third world country. Here in the United States I am saddened to say, that we have just as many problems with this as many other countries.

I urge all women out there to start small. Support your sisters every chance you get. Do something kind. Offer a kind word if you see a woman having difficulty. Don't be so quick to judge another woman when you don't know the entire story. PLEASE support your sisters no matter how small! Let the change begin with you! Maybe the ripple will be felt. We as women must change the way we think about ourselves. We must respect ourselves more. But most of all we have to drop the jealousy and support each other more. Please ladies......we must do something. But let that something begin with YOU!

http://www.uri.edu/artsci/wms/hughes/demand.htm

http://parade.condenast.com/274081/parade/jimmy-carter-speaks-out-for-women-excerpt-from-a-call-to-action/

http://www.state.gov/documents/organization/82902.pdf



Rose Ellen Moore

www.rcmooreunique.com

Roses, Thorns, Weeds and Dandelions

I haven't blogged in awhile...mostly because we have been closed!  It has been 4 days shy of 2 MONTHS that we have been closed!  I thought this would be the end of us, but my husband, who is the most determined man I know, brought us through.  He also kept me positive when I thought the world was coming to an end.   Just goes to show you, it's not whether you win or lose, it's how you weathered the storm. Life is so chock full of weird crazy horrible things...but you can't be afraid. You have to face demons, stupidity, adversity, racism and jealousy...but in the end, if you hold your ground, you will be victorious.


And so with that being said, I would like to give out some awards today......

ROSES....to my husband, Clayton!  I love this man with my heart, soul and gizzard! He is amazing and extraordinary! I am blessed....

ROSES to all of our friends who helped us move. How can we ever thank you? Sometimes people don't have to say they love you....sometimes all they have to do is show up.

ROSES to our landlord!  Wow...we have a wonderful new landlord that truly wants to see our business succeed. We appreciate that...because this is one man with a vision that knows..if we succeed, he succeeds...so it's all good.

THORNS< WEEDS AND DANDELIONS to our previous landlord who was so unreasonable. All he cared about was money in his pocket, not his building, not the people, and definately not the city of Allentown. Some people allow greed to rule their world....and it makes them ugly.

So now that we are open, our hours are 10AM-6PM Mon thru Sat. Your handbags must be registered at the counter. We are excited and happy to serve you and we hope that you enjoy our most unusual shop!

my secret..............

Here we are, another day of winter, another day of snow. I haven't written a blog in awhile, because the truth be told, I am fighting a bout of depression. I only like to post positive things and try to uplift people (including myself) but it has been a tough winter on many levels. 

Most of my close friends know and now I will share with my readers that I have had an eating disorder for most of my life starting when I was 19. I am now almost 52 and I struggle on a daily basis. That is why it is so important for me to uplift women when they come into my shop. 

I was married the first time to a man who was very abusive. I was 164 pounds at the time,(which for me is a size 8)  and he would always call me CONTINUOUSLY, a "fat f*****g bitch". "Fat greasy wop"  "old hat"  "greasy dago"....this was coming from my then HUSBAND. I lived with that for a long time. I decided the only way to lose weight was to not eat. So, I ate 1/2 of a pop tart every day at 10Am and then ate nothing for the rest of the day. I became extremely gaunt and thin, I was pale, I messed up my blood sugar, I have a heart valve problem to this day, my teeth turned gray, and all the while this was going on he would say, "20 more pounds and you will be perfect".  By whose standards? What exactly is perfect? This man almost destroyed me.  When I was hungry I would rub my teeth with toothpaste. I took Correctol like asprin. I  was so worried about gaining one ounce. I weighed myself 3 times a day!!!!   Since I came from a large Italian family, divorce was a big NO NO!  But guess what, to make a long story short, I did it anyway.  I suffered the consequences, but did it anyway. To make a long story very short, I married an extraordinary man about 10 years ago, and Clayton and I have a beautiful life together. He encourages me every day. I was on a great program before I opened my shop. I ran 5 miles a day and I ate good fresh things because I was home to prepare them. I took time with myself and for a few years my weight was a constant 177 at 5'7" tall and I had curves and felt good about myself. I also went to counseling once a week. When we opened this business I did not have the time to prepare my food. I tried, I really did. Now I am up 28 pounds. Every day I fight with my mind. "dont' eat, don't eat"...what it should be saying is...'make better choices"....I am here for approx 10 hours each day and then I must go home and make hats. That requires sitting.....I must find a way to get in 30 min of exercise. I must find a way to take better care of myself.  Being snowed in as much as we have didn't help me at all. The first thing I want to make when it snows is Macaroni and cheese! My family is predisposed to obesity and heart disease. My father died of diabetes. That CANNOT be me!  I take pictures of myself to show you all, that being a bigger person is not the end of the world, but it also encourages MYSELF. Society does not think that any kind of overweight or curviness can be beautiful. Well, I have news for them. Even at 177 I was curvy, and at 164 I was curvy. I am always going to have 'junk in the trunk' because God gave it to me and it will NOT go away! So, here I am in this photo of the day. Am I depressed about my weight? sometimes, just like EVERY woman. But every day, I try. Every day I encourage myself, and every day I remember NOT to do the unhealthy eating habits that I had that have now left me with health issues. 

I encourage every woman today, 

to wrap your body as if it were a gift. Because it is! Every day is a gift! Every breath is a gift!

Don't worry that you are not a size 2....and if you are very thin, don't worry that you are not a size 6...Beauty is what you feel about YOURSELF! So, ladies and gentlemen, my secret is out. But maybe now, we can encourage each other to eat healthy, take care of ourselves and be the beautiful beings that we were meant to be!

Rose Ellen Moore

www.rcmooreunique.com

Valentine's day.....MADNESS!

As we approach Valentine's Day, I hear many women, (like last year) lament at the fact they are not 'with' anyone for this particular holiday. THEN...there are the women that are married or partnered with someone yet they do not receive a gift for this holiday. I have a few words to say for this Valentine's day..and most of them are directed to my daughter, who is feeling badly about some choices she has made, and I want to tell her that 'it's ok'.  

How did Valentine's day start? Well, there are many stories shrouded in mystery. The Catholic Church used to recognize valentine's day in honor of Valentinus who married couples against what the government said. Now the church does not recognize it.  It used to be associated with a roman feast of lupercalia...where boys and girls names were drawn from a lottery and then became 'partners' for a year.  For whatever the reason, we now have society yet again telling me how to live my life. I MUST buy a Valentine for my husband, I MUST get something from my husband....or what? he doesn't love me?  Listen, I am a non comformist. I don't listen to society telling me I must be a size 2, I must wear my hair a certain way or be a certain thing. What I do is between me and my creator. So, as far as Valentine's Day, I say this. Women, if you are not with someone, so what? If you feel that you must celebrate Valentine's Day because society tells you to, then go buy yourself a kicky pair of shoes...go treat yourself to some nice clothes. Don't worry that no one loves you...people do. Most of all, you have to love YOURSELF!  If your husband or significant other is working hard for you every day, says he loves you, washes dishes occasionally or helps with the housework, then why do you need a valentine? THERE is your valentine. A Valentine to me is PROOF...what other proof do you need when he is doing things for you?

If a Valentine is a representation of love, then love yourself most of all! Love all the things about you that make you YOU!  That gap between your teeth, your wide hips, your eyes, your hair, your tattoos, your piercings, your small boobs, your big boobs, your feet...whatever! There is NO ONE like you in the whole world! aren't you lucky to be so unique and beautiful?  Celebrate yourself on Valentine's day without feeling badly that you do not have a partner. Celebrate that your mother gave birth to you, loved you and raised you and now you are a beautiful woman that deserves the best. So don't settle! If you want a bright red shiny new automobile, would you settle for a $300 no paint  rust bucket? NO!  Patiently wait for the right deal to come along. Until then, love love love YOURSELF!  Shower love upon others, your friends, your family, your children. If your heart is broken for whatever reason this Valentine's day....don't worry. A broken heart is an open heart. More love will come in. Be patient and love yourself......................


Happy Valentine's Day from RCMoore for the Unique Individual...because NO ONE is quite like YOU!

www.rcmooreunique.com

Make a statement without saying a word!

You know for the past few days I have listened to people on twitter and facebook talking about the Grammy's and how they were offended by this and that and some people were appalled by the fashions. Well ladies and gentlemen, I am here to tell you..creative people are just that. They want to be unique...out of the box. They are entertainers. They are not waiting for your opinion. They are going to leave your opinion and run right to the BANK! as we sit here with our opinions. LOL!  The more outrageous that are, the more people will talk about them, good or bad. Any kind of publicity is publicity just the same. And so...did you like what Beyonce was wearing? was she too sexy? and what's with the hair? and Pharrells hat? Madonna's grills? WHO CARES! these are artists! they are going to be out of the box!

I know for myself, many people ask me, 'where do you get your inspiration to make hats?" Well, I always want to be different, outrageous and unique. Who wants to come in and purchase a hat that they see someone else wearing? We all want to be validated. We all want to be individuals. We want to feel special. At least I know that I do!  so don't be afraid of what other people think. There will always be haters. When you wear something...OWN IT! don't be AFRAID! And don't worry about other people's opinions. They don't pay your bills!

Rose Ellen Moore

www.rcmooreunique.com

thank you Sonya Renee!

A friend of mine, Sharon Vidmar McCarthy posted something on her facebook which inspired me to write this blog. Sonya Renee's The Body is Not an Apology. When I heard her speak on youtube, I got goosebumps. Everything I have felt in all my 51 years welled up inside of me and I wanted to shout from the rooftops how powerful I am. How powerful WE are as women. An exerpt from this poem is as follows: The body is not an apology. Do not ask for it to be pardoned as criminal. The body is not a crime. The body is not an apology. The body is not soiled, is not filth to be forgiven. The body is not an apology. The body is not calamity. the body is not a math test, the body is not a wrong answer. The body is not a failed class. You are not failing. It is not a “broken” thing to be mended, to be tossed. The body is not to be prayed for. It is to be prayed to. So, HALLELUJAH. —excerpts from "The Body Is Not An Apology" by Sonya Renee When I listened to Sonya Renee SHOUT this poem...I wanted to stand up and say YES YES YES! I am not a mistake. I don't have to make an excuse for how I look, how I think, how I do things. I am a joyful creation. Everything that I consider a flaw is a gift!! As a boutique owner I have many women come into my shop and after trying on dress after dress or jeans after jeans, I look at the disdain in their faces as they half heartedly look at themselves with scorn. Why does it matter that we are not perfect? We have survived childbirth, cancer, diseases of many kinds, bullying, chastising, criticism, hate and racism. We have carried the weight of the world on our shoulders. We have supported people in our family through sickness and depression without a regard for ourselves. We should not apologize for how we look or who we are. We are to be celebrated that survived this 'thing' called LIFE and we are still here to tell about it. We as women need to support each other, black and white. Two young black women came into my shop yesterday and told me how much they loved the vintage and hats that I have here. They enjoyed our motto which is: RCMoore for the Unique Individual, because NO ONE is quite like YOU! I told them how much I support women. Every piece of jewelry we have at the shop is in support of some women's or children's group. I try to raise up my sisters. I want my shop to be an oasis where women feel confident and powerful. In their acquired confidance and power, they will then make better choices. The women were excited and they told me they just started a black women's group. They told me they didn't know where to have their meetings. i told them to have them here. I am not a black woman, but I am a woman just the same. I am someone's daughter, mother, sister, aunt and cousin. I have had many of the same problems that black women have had. I know most of you say, no no no, you are not black, you haven't had the racism. Well, my husband is an African man from a Carribean country. I am Italian and Roma. The racism is there for both of us. I say "is" because it never goes away. We can only manage the hatred, it never ever goes away. So my message today for women, please click on the link and listen to Sonya Renee's poem. Find yourself empowered. Do not apologize for your mastectomy, for your scars, for your sagging skin, your age, your hair or lack there of.....you are a woman to be celebrated by YOURSELF first and then give yourself to the world to be celebrated. If some people do not join in the party, leave them there and move on. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrbUTI95o3U (youtube poem) http://thebodyisnotanapology.tumblr.com/post/74452426784/the-real-impact-of-virtual-harassment (website) After listening to Sonya Renee, embrace your size 20 figure. Embrace your shame and your scars....the things you have gone through have made you a unique and fantastic woman. Do not apologize.......CELEBRATE!

Rose Ellen Moore www.rcmooreunique.com

don't let anyone take away your worth!

My message for women today is a very simple thing. Do not give anyone permission to hurt you or discourage you. Do not give anyone permission to treat you as a doormat. Do not accept people into your life who do nothing to value your life. Your job is to know your worth and to act accordingly. Do not rule your life by emotions based on other peoples' rejection of you. YOU know YOU. YOU make sure that you love YOU. I am saying these things because someone said a hateful hurtful thing to me the beginning of this week which actually sent me to my bed. I literally could not get out of bed. It crippled me to my very bone. This person that said this was surprising to me. I never thought this person would hurt me. I was not only saddened, but shocked beyond belief. It was unbelievable to me that someone who cared about me could actually cripple me with words. The only reason why I was crippled was because I ALLOWED this person to make me feel this way. I allowed this person to take away all of my value as a person. If someone bullies you and calls you dumb, it's because they fear being dumb themselves. If someone tells you that you are a turn off it's because they have something wrong with them! if someone says you are ugly or fat, it's only because THEY want to be YOU! There are many people out there with many different problems. We need to practice compassion and understanding with these people. But understand, their problems are THEIRS and you cannot fix them. THEY have to fix THEMSELVES. It is sinful for one woman to tear down another woman. It's equally as sinful and even more so for a man to degrade or tear down a woman. I would like to say to the 7 women who were sitting at the Perkins Restaurant in Bethlehem PA, THANK YOU for making me the subject of your conversation a few nights ago. I feel honored that you made little ole me your sole subject for the evening. All the laughs that you had at my expense did not hurt me. They made me feel sorry for you because you did little or nothing to even hide your bad manners. I didn't know if it was because my husband and I are an interracial couple or if it was because I was wearing a black and white outfit complete with fringed boots. Whatever the reason, I take pride in what I wear and try very hard to present myself in the best way possible. Your opinion of me..all 7 of you...did not matter at all. If you don't like my taste, I would suggest to acquire some. But I do want you women to know, that if you would come into my shop, you would be treated with the utmost respect and I would help you dress in the style that you like and what is appropriate for your body type. Because, unlike you, I was raised to respect everyone and lift up other women. This blog is not written to vent or to tear other women down. This is proof that even when we graduate from school and we have been all through the silly relatioship issues that we had way back in the day. Still, when we are grown, we still bully and do stupid, hateful things to hurt other people just because they are different from us. Why? I am sure that if there is life on another planet, they are surely looking at us shaking their heads, asking why we cannot just live and let live. There is a song sung by Bette Midler that says, "God is watching Us...from a distance.." yes..He is. Sadly watching as we tear each other down for the color of our skin, our culture, our beliefs and all for nothing. Now Valentine's Day is in February, and we are going to spend trillions of dollars buying Valentines to profess our love to our husbands, friends or significant others. Why don't we forego the card and actually practice loving those people and actually practice kindness and tenderness? I think people would be completely shocked. We are so used to buying a card saying goopy sweetness, and yet doing something completely opposite. No matter what other people do, the only thing that we can do is control ourselves. We cannot control the actions of other people. And so in closing I will suggest to everyone, man or woman. Do NOT allow anyone to take away your worth. Do NOT allow anyone to make you feel insignificant and small. All of us in our own way are important in whatever contribution we can give to this world. In the words of Viola Davis in the movie 'The Help'....YOU ARE KIND< YOU ARE SMART< YOU ARE IMPORTANT....I AM! Rose Ellen Moore www.rcmooreunique.com

What defines you?

Today as I was leafing through my mail and so many news articles, I came across so many things that all had one underlying message. At first I couldn't figure it out. But then, as I kept going, it spoke to me. My question to everyone today is 'what defines you?'   A 'efinition' is an explanation that is making who you are perfectly clear. It is the act of being clearly outlined.  What in your life explains who you are?

<sup>There are so many people out there that think that the lighter their skin color, the more doors will be open to them. Many years ago in Asia, the lighter your skin color, the more affluent your family was thought to be. Because the lighter skinned people were inside enjoying sitting on a tufted pillow, while the farm workers were baking in the hot sun. Many people all over the world try to bleach there skin. Many celebrities do it. Why? Is their skin color what defines them?

Then we have cosmetic surgery. Women and men trying to be younger, more virile, and it turns into plastic and artificial. Millions of dollars are poured into cosmetic surgery altering ones appearance. And then there is weightloss. I cannot express enough how sick I am about hearing this can make you lose weight...call here for your enrollment in a fitness club near you.  Is your young face, big boobs, tummy tuck and liposuction and the number on the scale a definition of who you are??

Today I came across a video on facebook of Lizzie Velasquez. Lizzie has a strange illness that they don't even have a title for. Someone had put her on youtube and labled her the ugliest person in the world. The hate that spewed from this video could have brought her to her knees. But instead...she turned into a motivational speaker. And here at 25 years old, goes out to speaking engagements and is handing in the copy of her third book. She has graduated college and is looking forward to moving on with her life and to someday start a family.  This video that I have attached to this blog is one of the best videos that can be shown to a young child especially a girl. What really defines us? Is it the way we look? Or can it be what we do and accomplish as a person?</sup> http://shockable.com/called-worlds-ugliest-girl-response-unbelievably-beautiful-literally-cried/

Lizzie has taught me that when I am having a bad day, I still have to fight. I have to fight on a daily basis to ignore the negativity that overtakes me. She taught me that I may be deaf in one ear, but I still have the other. She taught me that I may have made mistakes in my life, but I still have a good heart. She taught me that it's ok to be different. WE HAVE THE POWER...to steer our life in whatever direction we want our life to go. WE HAVE THE POWER to say what defines us as humans. DO NOT give that power to anyone else. Especially the people that are full of hate and discrimination. We should take a lesson from Lizzie and BE PROUD. STAND FIRM. USE the hateful things people say as a ladder to climb to your destination. Don't let anyone stop you, don't let anyone define you..don't let anyone bring you to a place where you want to end your life. 

What will people remember after we are gone? Is it the large boobs that you have? The light skin that you have? the beautiful body you have? Or is it what you have done for someone? What you have accomplished for yourself and for your community? What will define you long after you are gone?

Rose Ellen Moore

www.rcmooreunique.com

BE HAPPY

Today is January 7th of our new year. Today as I watched the news this morning, I found out that the FCC is investigating which diet fads work and which ones don't. I hate this time of year for one specific reason. People run to the gym, they run to the grocery to buy these diet pills, programs or whatever. Only to fail a month later.   I think it's great when people set their minds to getting healthier. I encourage people who try to eat better. I for one make a vow every morning...sometimes I win that day and sometimes I lose but the fact is I always try and I consciously make the choice. 

The important thing is that we should be happy with who we are, what we are, before we do anything else. We should work on enhancing our beauty instead of declaring ourselves 'not good enough'.  I get up every morning and ask myself what I am going to wear. Because my legs are thick I can't just put on any old thing. I have to camoflage, I have to create illusion. But that's the fun!  I have a 36 inch bust, a 26 inch waist and a 41 inch hip measurement!!!!   HOLY DISPROPORTIONS BATMAN! I don't know exactly how everything sunk, but I'm going to embrace it. This is me! I love me!

 I recite this poem to myself every day...thanks, Maya Angelou! 

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   

But when I start to tell them,

They think I’m telling lies.

I say,

It’s in the reach of my arms,

The span of my hips,   

The stride of my step,   

The curl of my lips.   

I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,   

That’s me.

Many people think that I have some secret that I carry. Why are you so happy? Why are you so confident? well, believe me, this did not happen overnight. But in time I have put all of my priorities in order. I have realized a few things and lived through some very horrendous things. My life is far from perfect. But it's the appreciation of what I do have that puts everything in order. 

Maintaining positivity is the number one key ingrediant to be happy.Optimism is a choice every day. The second thing to being happy is...treat your body well. Number three...be compassionate. Number four, smile often! number five....forgive wrongdoings of yourself and others. Number six...Love at every opportunity. 

  And so, with that being said...on this 7th day of January 2014...let your resolution be simple. Even if you are 250 pounds or more, even if you have some health issues, even if your car didn't start this cold morning and your children are giving you issues. Try to maintain the positive within yourself and try...please try ...to BE HAPPY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM

www.rcmooreunique.com

Rose Ellen A. Moore

Roses and Raspberries for 2014

This morning as I was getting ready for work, I had on Good Morning America, as I usually do, and lo and behold another 'fat shaming' idiot who shall remained nameless because he doesn't deserve the publicity, said a 'JOKE' about Alyssa Milano because of her post baby body.  What makes a man so insensitive? Is it because he is a male and doesn't understand what a body goes through to produce another living being or is he striving so hard to make people laugh that he screwed up? I don't know...you be the judge. But as for me...I give him RASPBERRIES!http://wonderwall.msn.com/tv/jay-mohr-says-alyssa-milano-weight-jab-was-a-joke-shes-stunning-1790031.story?ocid=answw11

On another happy note, Pro Infirmis is an organization in Germany that helps raise awareness and empathy for people with disabilities. Thanks to my daughter Sophia Johns, who posted this on her facebook, I was quickly educated and almost brought to tears this morning. Being in the fashion world, it is sometimes hard to keep my mouth shut about people who have no sensitivity, (see paragraph above) and so with this video, I am giving ROSES to Pro Infirmis and to my daughter Sophia,  and I urge all of you to look at the rest of their videos on You Tube
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8umFV69fNg

Now, I live in Bethlehem Pennsylvania and my business is in Allentown Pennsylvania. Is it cold here? well...does a bear **** in the woods? Today I woke up to 3 degree temperature. I was grateful that it wasn't -13 degrees like it is in Boston. The reality is this...when you live in the north, this is what we get. It comes every year, it goes every year. Try to be KIND to each other. HELP each other. Find the heart that each one of us has, and use it. Quit bitching about the guy going to slow in front of you, or about the guy that took your parking place. Try to be positive. It's hard...but life is easier with a smile. So....ROSES go to my friends, Mary and Tony Calcagni that allowed us the use of their snow blower to dig out our shop. Many of my customers will appreciate it and it made my husband so happy. A small act of kindness helps so many people.

To the hospital who wanted to pull little Jahi McMath's life support..words cannot express.....how can an institution that is supposed to help people be so cruel. Any amount of life, no matter how wretched, is still LIFE! I know I would never give up on my little girl, no matter how many fancy pants doctors told me it was hopeless. Sometimes hope is all you have in this world. RASPBERRIES....definately...for Children's Hospital Oakland.

RASPBERRIES to the New York Fashion Weeks Men's Trends for 2014 http://www.womensforum.com/new-york-fashion-week-2014-mens-trends.html
If my husband wore a white suit, he would be an automatic magnate for dirt. he can't do that. I would spend all day walking around him like a giant forcefield. Then they say, 'oh linen would be best'...are you kidding?> linen makes you look like an unmade bed by the end of day. so...only wear a white suit, if you STAND in a CORNER and don't EAT, SMOKE, TALK or get NEAR ANYONE!  rolled up pants? only on a boat. whoever wrote this....RASPBERRIES!

spring and summer 2014 for women ROSES! lots of ROSES! I can't wait. I'm in the middle of making my spring line of hats for the derby and this definately inspired me! check it out! http://www.swide.com/style-fashion/womens-trends/women-trends-spring-summer-2014-from-milan-london-paris-new-york-fashion-weeks/2013/10/04

and now...I send all of you ROSES! Roses for helping your neighbor. For checking on the elderly...for smiling at someone you don't know. When you feel the anger come up? push it down and treat yourself well for doing that. Roses for all.......until next time! ciao!!!!!

Rose Ellen Moore

www.rcmooreunique.com